Thursday, July 30, 2009
4:43 AM
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Damn was I fucking tempted to close down this totally dead blog but let's just say, I got bored alright? Now, on what the hell actually happened to me? Nothing. Okay, fine. Not nothing. Just fucked up. Literally everything is fucked up. I want to go back to primary school. No, not to study harder (well maybe only a little part of me would want that) but I just miss my friends there. I miss those days where people know who you are and you don't fucking know who they are. Ain't that cool? Oh, and also the trouble of saying "hi" wherever you go, since you know many people too. Not only that, when you have more friends, you tend to have more enemies too. Don't call me insane, but seriously, even bitching about people would be better than doing nothing.

So fine, to summarise all this shit up: I need, want, must socialise more. I'm not saying that my current friends aren't good enough or anything. (Please do not take any offence!) It's just, well, the current me is the total (okay fine, almost) opposite of what I used to be. The only same part of me is that I still don't trust people and I bottle up my feelings. Done, big deal. You know, one of the reasons I went to a school quite far from my house is because I thought I could widen my social circle, just like what happens in primary school. I obviously did not do a good job. I need all my favourite girlfriends. Without them, I just cannot open up to others properly. I trust them the most and it is only when they tust someone then will I be able to trust that person too.

So fuck this.

PS. the next time i blog will probably be a few months or maybe years later.